EU meetings: Hetalia Style!Germany: WHY THE FUCK WON'T YOU ALL JUST DO THINGS MY WAY?!!! EVERYTHING WOULD BE SO MUCH DAMN EASIER!!!
Prussia: -drawing his old borders on the map behind him, whistling.-
Germany: BRUDER, STOP DOING THAT!!!
Prussia: NO, I NEED TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS!!!
Hungary: -smacks him round the head with a rolling pin- SO DO I, AND THERE I HAVE.
England: Just get so smashed you can't even remember what gender you are anymore, Gilbert.
England: -shrugs- Works for me.
America: Dude, you're pathetic.
England: YOU'RE ONE TO BLOODY TALK YOU'RE NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE!!!
America: I'm the hero, I have to be everywhere!
America: Calm down, remember your blood pressure, grandpa.
England: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT, I AM THE BLOODY UNITED KINGDOM AND I WILL BE RESPECTED!!
England: ...Why?! Because...because...BECAUSE I HAD AN EMPIRE AND IF I STILL HAD IT YOU'D BE BOWING AT MY FEET!!
Germany: But you don't anymore, do you? So shut up and sit down, peasant.
France: Oh Germany, so cold! But wait, what is wrong with Italy? Portugal and Greece don't look too good either...
Germany: Don't bother talking to them anymore, France. They only respond to the word 'money'.
Italy Bros: WHERE?!!!
Germany: Oh shit.
Greece+Portugal: MONEYYYYYYYYYYYY!! -both start rampaging through the meeting hall. Everyone else takes cover.-
Germany: Oh Gott, I was afraid of this!!
England: -trying to salvage his tea essentials while also avoiding the rampaging nations- If you were afraid this would happen, why didn't you take measures to avoid it?!!
Germany: ...I don't know!! T_T France, help me!!
France: Non, I am too beautiful.
Germany: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!! AND WHERE THE HELL IS SPAIN?
France: Taking a siesta, I believe.
Germany: -stares for a moment in silence-. ..A SIIIIESSSTTTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA???!!!!
France: Oh shit.
-a few hours later, Spain's sorry ass is dragged bodily into the meeting hall by a fuming Germany-
Germany: SIESTA my blonde white ass!!
Spain: Oh come on, this isn't fair~ Five more minutes?
-Austria starts playing the piano in the corner-
Germany: What are you doing?!
Austria: Trying to soothe the atmosphere, don't yell at me!!
Germany: Come to think of it, where the hell is everyone else?! I told them, 12 o'clock!
England: They scarpered because of the rampaging Greece and Italies, obviously.
Germany: Oh yes. Hold on...-pacifies rampaging nations- There. You can all come back in now!
-they all re-enter-
England: OH MY GOD THERE'S MORE OF THEM!! THEY'VE COME TO SABOTAGE ME!!! -dives under the table- PROTECT MEEEE!!
America: ...You have problems, man.
Romania: We're not all spongers, you know!
England: I DON'T CARE!!
Bugaria: We do.
England: I HAVE STOPPED CARING.
Romania: WE WILL MAKE YOU THEN.
-magic war commences-
Germany: STOP THE MAGIC WAR THIS INSTANT!! SWEDEN, HELP ME!
Sweden: -has been blocking the madness out until now-...Hm?
France: -to Belgium- What are you doing there?
Belgium: I didn't have breakfast this morning, so I brought waffles. -slaps Netherland's hand, as he was trying to pinch one.- No! Bad!
France: Can I have some?
Luxembourg: -evil giggle-
Poland: -observing- One side of the room waging a magic war and screaming, the other fawning over waffles...why did I join this stupid club?
Poland: No, I think it was for the food.
Lithuania: Are you sure it wasn't money?
Lithuania: ...So you're not sure?
Poland: Shut up, Liet!
Other Baltics: Maybe if we don't make a sound we'll be alright...
Malta: Good plan. I'll join you.
Cyprus: Do I hear banging on the door...?
-they all look and listen. There is indeed someone banging at the door.-
Turkey: LET ME IN YOU BASTARDS!!!
Greece: -springing into action- NO, FUCK OFF!
Turkey: I REFUSE!! I DESERVE TO BE IN THERE TOO!!
Greece: NO YOU DON'T!
Turkey: I DO!
Germany: SHUT UP! SHUT. UP.
-storms over to the door, pulls it open so hard he almost tears it off its hinges, and boots Turkey straight in the face.- TAKE THAT AND STAY OUT.
Germany: The author of this didn't know what to do with you, did she?
Both: No she did not.
Finland: How do you think I fucking feel?
Finland: OH EVERYBODY CAN CURSE EXCEPT ME, IS THAT IT?
Finland: Well, I think you people are a bunch of immature little sissies! Fuck all of you, I'm going to have lunch!
England: ...I think we'd all better go, don't you?
Germany: Fine, fine, just go...oh Gott, this was a terrible idea, wasn't it?
England: Oh, and Prussia's just drawn himself on the map again.